


Remember When?

by Samunderthelights



Series: Zalex Week 2020 [2]
Category: 13 Reasons Why (TV)
Genre: Boys Kissing, Don't copy to another site, First Kiss, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Kissing, M/M, Memory Loss, Mentions of Suicide Attempt, Sharing a Bed, Takes place during S2, Zalex, Zalexweek2020, zalexweek2k20
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-08
Updated: 2020-07-08
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:08:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25145956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Samunderthelights/pseuds/Samunderthelights
Summary: Alex is grateful for Zach's help, but he can't help but feel like there is something he is missing. Some kind of clue as to how they ended up where they are now. Flashes of memories are beginning to come back to him, so one night when Zach is staying over, he decides to ask him for the truth.---Zalex Week 2K20 : Day 2 - Sharing a Bed
Relationships: Zach Dempsey & Alex Standall, Zach Dempsey/Alex Standall, Zalex - Relationship
Series: Zalex Week 2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1820161
Comments: 5
Kudos: 71
Collections: Zalex Week 2k20





	Remember When?

**Author's Note:**

> Hi!  
> I'm not going to lie, I struggled with this prompt, because I had already made the boys share a bed in the story for Day 1, and somehow I just could NOT come up with anything. So I don't even know what this is. But I didn't want to skip a day, so here is my attempt at the 'Sharing a Bed' story. I apologize.  
> On to Day 3, I guess?  
> Xx

“Stop it, will you?” Alex spits out, when Zach turns around next to him in bed for the however-manieth time. “If you can’t lie still, you can go sleep on the floor.”

“Sorry,” Zach mumbles, turning yet again, but this time so he can face Alex. “I’m not used to sharing a bed with someone.”

“No shit.”

“If you want me to go…”

“It’s fine,” Alex whispers, pretty sure that if he were to send Zach home now, his parents wouldn’t be too happy with him, seeing as they were the ones who told Zach to stay over in the first place. They had spent the whole night playing video games, and by the time they had managed to drag themselves away from the game, it had been long after midnight. The Standalls thought it was too late for Zach to drive home, so without accepting any kind of objection, they had told him to stay.

Alex hadn’t minded, but it’s been at least an hour since they have gone to bed, and with the way Zach keeps tossing and turning next to him, he doubts he’ll be getting any sleep.

“Can I ask you something?” he whispers. “About what happened before I…”

“Yeah, of course.”

“I keep remembering something, or at least I think I am, but I don’t know if it’s real or not.”

“About the tapes?” Zach asks, but Alex quickly shakes his head. “Then what?”

“We were arguing, in the bathrooms.”

“Right…”

“Were we?” Alex asks, and although Zach shakes his head, he can tell that there is more to it. “What happened? I remember you grabbing my arm, and I think I pushed you?”

“Yeah.”

“And?” Alex asks, getting a little frustrated. Ever since he had gotten home, and Zach had started to help, he has been feeling like Zach has been keeping something from him. He feels like there is a catch to his help, or there is something he should know, but he can’t quite figure out what it is that he is missing, because he can’t remember the weeks before he shot himself.

He had tried to tell himself that he was just being paranoid though, that Zach was really just a nice guy, that his help had nothing to do with Hannah, the tapes, everything that had happened. Everything he should remember, but can’t. But when he sees the guilty look on Zach’s face, a feeling of dread washes over him.

“Why are you here, Zach?” he asks. “What happened?”

“Nothing. I’m here because we’re friends, okay?” Zach quickly says, but his answer comes out a little shaky, and it only makes Alex trust him less. “We were not arguing.”

“Then what the fuck happened?”

“You were upset,” Zach begins to explain, “So I came to check on you.”

“Why?”

“Why? Because I was worried? You were pretty messed up, Alex. After what happened with Hannah… I was worried about you.”

“But I remember…,” Alex begins, but then he sits up, the image of Zach grabbing his arm so real, that he can’t imagine being wrong about it.

Zach sits up too, but he just shrugs, that guilty look still on his face.

“I need to know, Zach.”

“Do you?” Zach asks, before letting out a sigh.

“You’re scaring me,” Alex admits. “Did I do something? What is so bad that you can’t tell me? I’m going to remember eventually, so…”

“You kissed me,” Zach blurts out, and the longest silence follows. “I came to see if you were okay, you tried to leave, I grabbed your arm and you… you kissed me.”

“I’m sorry,” Alex mumbles, “I don’t remember it, but…”

“Well, I do, okay?” Zach asks. “You freaked out, and when I tried to talk to you about it, you pushed me off and you ran off. Next thing I knew…”

“I shot myself,” Alex realizes, finally starting to put the pieces together. “That had nothing to do with kissing you, Zach.”

“How do you know, huh? I knew you were freaking out, and I let you leave. If I had gone after you…”

“Is that why you’re helping me? You feel guilty?”

“Yeah,” Zach admits. “I do.”

“Don’t. I didn’t try to kill myself because of a fucking kiss, Zach. I don’t remember what happened, but kissing you… I’m pretty sure that was the least of my problems.”

Zach stares down at his hands, wishing he wouldn’t have said anything, but when Alex grabs his hand, he looks up.

“You could have told me.”

“I didn’t want you to freak out again.”

“I’m not,” Alex sighs. “Freaking out, I mean. I’m a little shocked I kissed you, but… I’m sorry, I guess.”

“It’s fine. That’s what I tried telling you, but you ran off,” Zach tries to explain. “I tried to tell you that … you know…”

“I don’t know. Seriously. Most of that time is a blur.”

“That I was okay with us kissing,” Zach mumbles, and it takes a moment for Alex to realize what he is saying, but when it hits him, he can’t help but laugh. “I guess you laughing at me is better than freaking out, but…”

“I am not laughing at you, I just… what the fuck are we doing, Zach?”

“Talking.”

“Not now. But I can’t even remember any of that. How did we get to…”

“Kissing?”

“Yeah.”

“We didn’t. Not really.” Zach shrugs. “That’s probably why you freaked out.”

“You really thought I tried to kill myself over a kiss?”

“No, of course not. But I knew you were upset, and I didn’t go after you. I felt like, if I had just talked to you and gotten you to calm down… I could have stopped you.”

“That’s bullshit, and you know it.”

A silence follows, until Alex lies back down, a pensive look on his face.

“Are you okay? Do you want me to sleep on the floor?”

“No, of course not,” Alex quickly says, but then he sighs. “I just wish I could remember, you know?”

“You will. Just give it time.”

Zach lies down next to him, and this time there is a nervous, almost giddy tension as their eyes meet.

“I really kissed you?”

“Yeah, you did. It was a good kiss!” Zach laughs, but when he sees the look on Alex’s face, he sighs. “I meant what I said, about being okay with us kissing.”

“Yeah?”

Zach nods, before carefully, almost hesitantly bringing his hand up to the side of Alex’s neck. He ever so gently brushes his thumb over his jaw, before bringing their mouths together, still half-expecting Alex to freak out. But instead, Alex kisses him back, and when they break the kiss, there is nothing but nervous laughter.

“Was that okay?”

“I think so,” Alex whispers. “I mean, I don’t remember that other kiss, but…”

“It doesn’t matter,” Zach quickly says. “This can count as our first kiss, right?”

“That makes it sound like there will be more.”

“I hope so. Don’t you?” Zach asks, but Alex just shrugs. “I’m not just here because I feel guilty, Alex. I’m here because I like you, okay? I care about you.”

“I am really fucked up, Zach. This… whatever it is, you don’t need any of this.”

“I do,” Zach reassures him, before flashing a small smile. “I’d really like to kiss you again.”

“Do you even know what you’re getting yourself into?” Alex tries, but he can’t stop the smile from forming on his face, as Zach kisses him again.

“We should probably try and get some sleep.”

“Like I can get any sleep with you lying next to me.” Alex rolls his eyes. They both close their eyes, Alex already counting to ten, hoping that he won’t actually kick Zach out of the bed if he keeps on tossing and turning. But when he feels an arm sliding around his waist, he can’t help but smile.

“What are you doing?”

“Going to sleep.”

“Yeah, but…,” Alex tries, but when he feels Zach placing a soft kiss onto the back of his neck, before snuggling up to him, he swallows back the rest of his words. He doesn’t expect Zach to stay like this for longer than a minute though. But just as he is beginning to wonder when he will get uncomfortable and he will start moving around again, he can hear him beginning to snore softly into the back of his neck, and he realizes that he is sleeping peacefully.

Finally.

**Author's Note:**

> Tumblr : https://samunderthelights.tumblr.com/


End file.
